A family affair
Linda Soller | Apr 29, 2013
This past weekend I attended the second of my two family weddings in April. They were not family weddings in the traditional sense of the word “family.” Neither of the brides or grooms are actually related to me, but I think of both brides as family. I have known one since she was in the 3rd grade and the other since she was a freshman in college. Both are important in the life of one of my daughters and that makes them important to me. It never crossed my mind to miss either wedding.
When our children are growing up we worry about who they will befriend, will they get mixed up with problem kids, will they be led astray by some misguided friend, and will they have friends who are there for them when we can’t be. Naturally our own children are not the problem kids! We all want our children to have good friends, people they can trust, support, care about, lean on, laugh with, and treasure. We try to teach our children how to be good friends to others, but we pretty much find ourselves watching this friendship thing unfold and feel a little helpless. The friends your children have as they grow up hold tremendous influence on the people your children become. Your children may be strong enough to stand up for themselves, but how their friends respond to their decisions can increase or kill their self-esteem.
Time progresses, good friends become like family. Often they have shared your joys and most difficult times. They’re sometimes the person who holds our secrets and the person who can be totally honest with us. Your mom and dad tell you to be careful or that you’re a good person. You think, “You’re my parent so of course you’re going to say that.” Your friend can say the same thing and you take it to heart because they’re your friend, they care about you and they will tell you the truth. Somehow we think our friends can be more objective than our family members. The bond between good friends is very special.
When we think about Jesus’ teachings we often think of how he told us to love one another. He encouraged us to look out for each other and share what we have, sounds like he is describing friendship. When the early churches were forming the disciples reminded followers to be thoughtful, to work together, and to take care of each other, still sounds like the description of a friend. When Jesus was met with a crowd he was often drawn to the person who was needy and who looked up to him for a healing touch or word, and yet again it sounds like a friend.
The line between the love and bond we have with family and what we share with friends is a fine one. At times there is no line at all, just the rules of society that say what does and does not constitute a family. It is nice to have friends we love like family and family who are dear friends. Yep, I just got back from the wedding of my daughter’s friend, and it was a family affair.
Have a great week :o) Linda